A little over a year ago we found out we were pregnant. At the time I had no idea what motherhood and life had in store for us!! Fast forward to June and I say “see you soon” to my friends/co-workers as I went on maternity leave and then a few days later Miss Kenzie arrived. When I left for maternity leave I “knew” for a fact that I would return 3 months later to my job… I thought it would be something I would want to do, need to do, and even have to do… so there was no question in my mind about returning to work… it was going to happen and I was 100% okay with that!!
Well, I had NO idea my heart would tug so strongly in a different direction. Almost immediately after Kenzie’s arrival I started to DREAD heading back to work (it wasn’t a few weeks left into my maternity leave that I felt it, it was DAYS into it…)… As much as I loved spending time with Kenzie part of me hoped these were just feelings that might go away, and blah blah blah. You might ask me why I had hoped the feelings would go away… well I didn’t think staying at home was something I could consider, so I hadn’t really thought about it. Yeah, we’d talked about me one day just doing photography… but me being a glass half empty kind of girl… I just figured it was a dream and not something that would actually happen… so this tug to stay home with my little girl and the tug of what I’m passionate about weighed very heavily on my heart for 12 weeks… October arrived (much to my dismay) and I started back at work. I LOVED being back with my friends and family (because after close to 4 years of working alongside of people that’s what they became… my family)… but I HATED being away from Kenzie and I hated having to put my passion/love for something completely on the back burner… so after much continued prayer (I say continued, because we have been praying for years for direction on where/what God wants us/wants of us as a family… and the one thing we’ve always said is that we don’t want it to be our own selfish desires that makes us make certain decisions, but we want our desires to be God’s desires, and we want to follow Him and really be a family that listens and seeks Him in our lives…) and chatting with my amazing husband we decided that right now, in this season… that the best thing for our family is for me NOT to work full time, but to be home with our little girl and really pursue my passion of photography and make being a photographer a full time thing!!
So a year after finding out we were pregnant, years after dreaming the dream of being just a photographer… I get to say that today starts the next chapter in our lives. I get to stay home with my little girl (which I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I am to call myself a stay at home mom and pour into this amazing little girl all day long) AND I get to keep pursuing my dream of being a photographer!!!! I knew that one day I would get to really pursue my dream… didn’t have a clue when it would happen, and never in my mind did I think having my baby girl would be the stepping stone to really make my dream a reality, but it is,and I am so incredibly excited and thankful for the opportunity… but more importantly, I never thought I’d get to stay home and love on my little girl all day long. I’m sooo sooo sooo excited about what lies ahead. I know everyday won’t be roses, and there are going to be so many challenges that face me and our family with me being home/running a business/pursing our dreams… but at the end of the day no matter what goes right or wrong, we are a family and this is our journey together!!!
And because I certainly can’t post a post without a picture I’m leaving you with a photo from our family session we did a few weeks back with the amazing Alyse (more photos to come in a few weeks 🙂 )…